Celebrity News Network

Well the last time I spoke of Paris Hilton, I told you her problem was less psychic and more gastric but 24hrs on, I have to confess that it appears to actually a bit of both. According to reports the holed-up-in-jail-heiress is struck with paranoia that she might be photographed in the jail using while using the loo…

Though on the first day she gulped down some cereal and bread but since hasn’t taken anything – either solid or liquid for the fear that she might be ‘captured’ while she relived herself… ooooo now I know how stinky can Paris get… it really must be one hell of a ‘piss’ing off situation for the cops out there.

Weird lady is this Paris Hilton… first she wants the loo then she doesn’t want the loo…. But she’s a celebrity and one must allow her the freedom of pooh-poohh after all its all about To Pee or Not to Pee

Well guys… if you were wondering why would be such a pain to woo someone so beautiful as Keira Knightley… then check out what a poor guy went throught when he tried doing just that - Woo Keira Knightley…

No pun intended here, but I must confess it hurts so much to see  Paris Hilton wail and cry… I cannot take this horrible fate that has descended upon the diva of all prison mates… opps I meant the diva of all divas… Paris ‘now in prison’ Hilton.

But boys… don’t you think that things have been a tad boring without her on the prowl… the paparazzi for most of the weekend was parched outside the prison and with hardly anyone visiting the heiress in her Twin Towers Correctional Facility; it was a rather dull and boring weekend.

But guys I’ve got some breaking news up my sleeve, the wailing and crying Paris Hilton that we have been treated to all weekend it appears has finally given up crying and has actually seemed settled of her ‘psychological’ problems. With hardly any hamburgers on offer and no booze in sight it appears Paris has finally given up crying and had cereal and bread for the evening dinner.

Now we learn folks, from reliable sources that actually the whole point of Paris wailing and crying all the way to the Paris was because they just wouldn’t let her visit the loo in the courtroom. Actually all the booze and junk has spoiled her system beyond measure that she’s been up and about the loo all along, and that her problem is more gastric than psychic

So let Paris be in the ‘correction facility’ for some more time, after all its some ‘personal time’ that she wants…

Here are the snaps of one of the Hottest looking couple in Hollywood. hehehe I am just fooling around you, these are some of the ugliest I have seen of the couple.

Xtina- Christina and her hot husband- JORDAN ( i love kidding with you, dont I ) are seen celebrating at Jordan’s birthday at a Hawaiian-themed party.

Well if you observe closely, these are not the regular- paparazzi pictures, where in the couple/individual is trying to escape camera but the paparazzi take snaps anyways.

Look at Xtina, she is clearly posing for the camera, did someone say they both are looking hot ? Very much possible !! How else can you explain 2 funny looking people, mimicking comedians in stage shows, wanting to desperately get on cam ??

Well i have nothing against Xtina, or lemme say HAD !! She seems to me following Jordan and looks to have acquired his characteristics. Good luck, Xtina !!

Yupieee !! I lovee todayy .. The climate is so good outside.. Birds are chirping. The air is is full of the fragrance of sweet lovely flowers. Its all green everywhere.… Well ya i knw all that was gay !! I was searching online for some statements to show how Happy I am and I found this on some site and here I copy pasted it. Well I am Gay ( the Happy- Gay I mean ) . hehehe

So you should thank only one person for this GAY-state of mine !!

She is the MOST BEAUTIFUL FEMALE in the world, acc. to me. Yess !! We are talking about my sweetheart - Elisha CuthBert.

Sad part is she rarely makes appearances and  on the rare occasions that she does make an appearance she dresses crazy or funny or weird. Luckily today is not one of those days.

Agree that she doesn look as hot or young as her ‘Girl NExt door’ days, but she sure can still give me a hard-on ( wait !! is that a benchmark, every other hot looking female is capable of that .. Hell nevermind !! )

I hate doing a post on Britney Spears and today I vomited badly and so I want you guys to vomit too and so I am posting on Britney Spears.. Ewww !!

Have a look at that snap and I guess I dun need to talk anything!! The picture talks for itself.

That’s Britney’s ass !! It has touched the nadir. Its full of flab and cellulite. For a whole second( i dun think more than that about Britney Spears ) , I was left wondering if I was looking at Britney’s mom’s ass or Britney’s grandmom’s ass. After 2 seconds I realized it is her ass !!!

I don’t wanna comment any further. My stomach has already started acting funny. Talk to you later..Cheerss !! happy Puking !!

I don’t know why I am posting this !!! A very strange posting !!

This is lovely Jessica Simpson. She is seen sporting the ” Forty Licks “  cool tee of the band Rolling Stones !!

Which band wouldn’t want a hot babe like Jess to wear their merchandise. She also has cool gogs on and those lovely sandals. She is just amazing !!

P.S: I just need that tee shirt !!  I JUST NEED IT . And ya I hate Rolling Stones. !!

Some more shocking snaps of Lindsay Lohan again. Realizing that this is the time to release any unseen snaps of Lindsay Lohan, each and every one of her friends and foes, keep coming with a new series of snaps every other day.

The latest pictures show Lindsay Lohan and some unknown girl playing with a knife and Lilo also trying to show her beasts. They are reported to be 4 months old. I must say that these snaps are one of the hottest I have seen of Lindsay Lohan.

It is so very perfect. 2 girls, dopiness ( like that’s a word) , Knifes, Breats, exposure , bitchiness… Ummmm Totally perfect  :-D  .

Ok, Who’s next ?? You guys know my e-mail address right ? 

Bitch is in jail already. And hold your breath, Paris Hilton has reported to serve her jail sentence, 2 nights earlier than scheduled. This has to be the MOST SHOCKING NEWS OF this weekend, err the Week, err the Month, err the year, Oh common!! Cut the crap, she aint got that big a value

She reported straight after leaving the MTV Movie Awards ( of course she made that big appearance and let the ‘Oh- so- cute- and–sweet’ snaps of her taken ).
She issued the following statement:

“I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation. During the past few weeks, I have had a lot of time to think and have come to realize I made some mistakes. This is an important point in my life and I need to take responsibility for my actions. In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make. I want to thank my family, friends and fans for their continued support. Although I am scared, I am ready to begin my jail sentence.”

She naturally (of course) looked scared as she reported much before schedule. Remember she has been on a spree to show people how she has changed over the last couple of weeks and how delicate and sensitive she has become ( BL**** Actor! ) .
So this was her last night out for the coming 23 days. Some crazy people said she looked pretty, now you decide that for yourself, in the snaps below.

For now I am gonna sit back and relax at a time when The biggest scum on our planet is in prison. Let’s look forward to a clean USA for the next 23 days ( Was that gay ?? ) .

Keep watching this space, for any secretly taped footage of PARIS in PRISON very soon !!

Well I am bored of writing stories and stories about the crazy and shocking antics of Lindsay Lohan anymore.

So lets have a welcome change today by posting something good about my favourite LiLo. Oh !! FUI, I heard LiLo has come out of the Rehab already. 1 full day is what I hear she spent at Malibu. lol.

Well here are some half naked and hot snaps of Lindsay Lohan. These are the new ad campaign photos for Jill Stuart. She is covered by a purse , I dunno if she’s naked under the purse, but she sure looks hot and kinky.

I dunno what was their idea behind shooting this ad, I mean covering a naked LiLo, by a purse !! What were they thinking ?? Really amazes me!! Will this make the customers by the purse ?

Lol. good thing though is its a good news after a long time on Lilo( or is it ? )